The Last Move: A Christian's Guide to the Retirement Village, the New Friends, and the God Who Goes With You

The Week the Boxes Went

There is a week in the Christian life that comes for almost every family in Sandton. The week the boxes go. The week the family helps the parents move into the retirement village. The week the family packs up the kitchen, the lounge, the bedroom, the small study, the back garden, the back room where the youngest slept when she was home from university. The week the family packs up the bookcase that holds the Bibles from 1960, the hymn book from 1975, the photo album from 1980, the marriage certificate from 1955.

The move into the retirement village is one of the great moves of the South African Christian life. The move is real. The move is also a kind of death. The house goes. The garden goes. The Sunday school goes. The book club goes. The Bible study group that has met in the front room for twenty years goes. The Bible study at the local church on the Wednesday evening goes. The morning coffee with the neighbour goes. The drive to the shop goes.

The Christian in Johannesburg has to decide how to think about the move. The Christian has to decide what the Bible says about the move. The Christian has to decide how to welcome the parent into the retirement village. The Christian has to decide how to think about the parent who has begun the new chapter.

This post is for the Christian in Johannesburg or Sandton who is making the move, or who is helping the parent make the move, or who is the daughter or granddaughter of the parent who has just made the move. The move is real. The Bible is real.

What the Bible Actually Says About Old Age

The Bible has a great deal to say about old age. The Bible treats old age as a gift. The Bible treats old age as a time of particular wisdom. The Bible treats old age as a time of particular calling. The Bible treats the elder in the community as a blessing the community cannot do without.

Leviticus 19:32 — Stand up in the presence of the aged, show respect for the elder.

Psalm 71:9 — Do not cast me away when I am old; do not forsake me when my strength is gone.

Psalm 71:18 — Even when I am old and gray, do not forsake me, my God, till I declare your power to the next generation, your mighty acts to all who are to come.

Proverbs 16:31 — Gray hair is a crown of splendor; it is attained in the way of righteousness.

Proverbs 20:29 — The glory of young men is their strength, gray hair the splendor of the old.

Isaiah 46:4 — Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.

Titus 2:2-4 — Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance. Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children.

Job 12:12 — Is not wisdom found among the aged? Does not long life bring understanding?

The Bible does not treat old age as a story of decline. The Bible treats old age as a story of inheritance. The elder in the church is the one who remembers the prayer that the Bible study prayed before the children were born. The elder in the church is the one who remembers the funeral that the church held for the grandmother in 1990. The elder in the church is the one who remembers the revival that the church saw in 1975.

The elder in the retirement village has not stopped being an elder. The elder in the retirement village is still the elder of the family. The elder in the retirement village is still the elder of the church. The elder in the retirement village is still the elder of the country.

What the Bible Says About the Move Into the New Place

The move into the retirement village is also a kind of move that the Bible has already had a word for. The Bible has the move of Abraham. The Bible has the move of Ruth. The Bible has the move of the Israelites into the exile. The Bible has the move of the early Christian into the new city. The move is real. The Bible is real.

Genesis 12:1 — Go from your country, your people and your father's household to the land I will show you.

Joshua 1:9 — Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.

Hebrews 13:14 — For here we do not have an enduring city, but we are looking for the city that is to come.

Philippians 3:13-14 — Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken a piece of it; but one thing I do: forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

The move into the retirement village is not a punishment. The move is a kind of going. The Christian in the retirement village is not the Christian who has been abandoned. The Christian in the retirement village is the Christian who has been called to a new kind of going.

What the Bible Says About the Loneliness of the New Place

The loneliness of the retirement village is one of the great pains of the Christian life in 2026. The loneliness is real. The Christian in the retirement village has to live with the loss of the front room, the loss of the book club, the loss of the Bible study, the loss of the morning coffee, the loss of the drive into Sandton. The loneliness is a kind of death. The loneliness is also a kind of call.

Psalm 25:16 — Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted.

Psalm 68:6 — God sets the lonely in families, he leads out the prisoners with singing.

Isaiah 41:10 — So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

John 14:18 — I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.

Psalm 23:4 — Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff comfort me.

The Christian in the retirement village has to hold the faith at the moment of the loneliness. The Christian has to hold the Bible. The Christian has to pray. The Christian has to ask the daughter to come back from Johannesburg on the Saturday afternoon. The Christian has to ask the granddaughter to come back from Pretoria on the Sunday morning. The Christian has to keep the door open for the new neighbour.

What the Christian in the Retirement Village Has Started Doing

In the last three years, the Sandton Bible study has begun to think about the Christian in the retirement village. We do not abandon the elder. We do not visit once a year. We do, however, do three things.

We invite the elder to come back to the Wednesday evening Bible study in Parkmore. The Bible study is at 7:30pm. The Bible study is on time. The Bible study is in Parkmore. The elder can come. The elder can also not come. The invitation is real. The Bible study is real.

We organise a Bible study at the retirement village. The Bible study is on the Wednesday afternoon. The Bible study is in the retirement village's community room. The Bible study is for the elders of the retirement village. The Bible study is led by one of the elders of the Sandton Bible study. The Bible study is small. The Bible study is faithful. The Bible study is real.

We pray for the elder by name at the Bible study on the Wednesday evening. The prayer is real. The prayer is short. The prayer is for the elder to know that the church has not forgotten them. The prayer is for the elder to know that the elder is still an elder of the church.

What the Children Can Do

The Christian in Johannesburg who is the son or daughter of the elder who has just made the move has a particular question. What does the Christian do?

The Bible is clear about this. The Bible treats the honouring of the parent as one of the great commandments.

Exodus 20:12 — Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.

Ephesians 6:2-3 — Honor your father and mother which is a command with a promise, that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.

1 Timothy 5:4 — But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God.

1 Timothy 5:8 — Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the world the true faith and is worse than they had ever been.

The Christian has to honour the parent. The Christian has to call the parent on the Saturday afternoon. The Christian has to call the parent on the Sunday afternoon. The Christian has to bring the grandchildren to the parent on the Wednesday afternoon. The Christian has to ask the parent what the parent needs. The Christian has to be the parent's friend in the new place.

What the Bible Says About the Last Move

The last move is also a move. The last move is the move that the Christian in the retirement village has begun to think about. The last move is the move that the Christian has to make with the family. The last move is the move that the Christian has to make with the church. The last move is the move that the Christian has to make with the Jesus.

2 Timothy 4:6-8 — For I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time for my departure has come. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day — and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for it.

Philippians 1:21 — For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.

Revelation 14:13 — Then I heard a voice from heaven say, "Write this: Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord from now on." "Yes," says the Spirit, "they will rest from their labor, for their deeds will follow them."

The Christian in the retirement village has a Bible for the last move. The Bible has a hope for the last move. The Bible has a Jesus for the last move. The last move is real. The hope is real.

A Short Prayer for the Retirement Village

Father, you are the God of the last move. You are the God of the new neighbour. You are the God of the new Bible study. You are the God of the new Wednesday afternoon. You are the God of the loneliness, and the best possible healer. We pray for the elder who has just moved. We pray for the elder who has been in the retirement village for ten years. We pray for the elder who has begun to think about the last move. Help us to be a faithful church for the elder. Help us to be a faithful family for the elder. We ask this in the name of the one who said, "I am the resurrection and the life." Amen.

An Invitation

If you are a Christian in Johannesburg or Sandton who has just moved into the retirement village, or who is the daughter or granddaughter of the parent who has just made the move, or who has begun to think about the last move, the Wednesday evening Bible study in Sandton is open to you. The Bible study begins at 7:30pm on Wednesday evenings. We meet at the Bible study room in Parkmore. We also have a Wednesday afternoon Bible study at the local retirement village. The Bible is real. The Bible study is real. The Jesus is real.

If you are a Christian who is also an elder of the retirement village, or who is also a neighbour in the retirement village, or who is also a son or daughter who has begun to think about the parent's move, the Bible study is open to you. The Bible is real. The friendship is real. The grace is real.